This post may come across as controversial to some!! Get over it. And no doubt my experience as a dog owner skews it as I practiced the same principle with our Border Collie and my kids.
As dog owners, we often “feel guilty” about disciplining our pups — but we shouldn’t because “discipline is not punishment.”
While binge-watching Discovery on many sleepless nights on a business trip, I started to appreciate the teachings of Cesar Millan, The Dog Whisperer.
There is a formula for success. In the dog world, that is exercise, discipline, and affection. Most people do affection, affection, affection instead of exercise, discipline, affection. Most people don’t understand the proper understanding of discipline.
For Millan, discipline means providing a calm space for your dog and following through with training. Many pet parents discipline their dogs “out of frustration,” so their “timing is off” and the animal cannot understand exactly what their human wants.
Instead, he recommends creating a peaceful learning environment and then teaching the dog what it’s supposed and not supposed to do. “Peaceful in the dog world means respect.” That’s one thing dog people often don’t put together right in our domain,” he explained.
After many frustrating attempts with my kids, I fell back on this principle. Our Border Collie was trained and brought up with exercise, discipline, and affection. Living in an apartment in a massive city with an active and needy dog took work.
As my kids grew up during COVID with the many restrictions we faced in Shanghai, it felt like a return to earlier days when our dog was younger and more energetic.
Replace pets/pup/dog with kids/kid/child. The above principle reads the same!
One of the biggest problems we face as parents is “feeling guilty” about disciplining our kids —but we shouldn’t be because “discipline is not punishment.”
Exercise, discipline, and affection are a formula for success in the kids’ world. Most people do affection, affection, affection instead of exercise, discipline, affection.
Discipline means providing a calm space for our child and following through with teaching and training. Many parents discipline their children “out of frustration,” so their “timing is off” and the child cannot understand exactly what their parent wants.
Instead, create a peaceful learning environment and then teach the child what he/she is supposed and not supposed to do. Peacefulness in the child (dog) world means respect. That’s one thing that most parents often don’t put together right.